Successful Failure from Ansky. 25 May 2009, 10:10.

A few days ago, I made a mistake in the $25k NL HU tournament on FTP in the opening round. A mistake which I should never make. There are many types of mistakes in poker, and I have made thousands of each in my life, surely. Making a poor read of someones range in a spot, of their timing, of their betsizing, or of their mindset. When I am trying to be creative, and testing out a play on someone when I am not sure it will work, and it fails, I rarely get upset. When I feel like I have let myself down though, when I failed to make a fold, or a call, that I simply would make if I was playing better, I get distraught.

I opened to 120 at 20/40 with KQo, and my opponent called. The flop came 54Qr. He ck called a cbet of 200. The turn was a J of diamonds, putting up a flush draw. I bet again 440, he check raised to 1300 or so, and I called. The river was an offsuit J, and he shoved for around a pot sized bet. Technically, many people would call this river a good card for me. It reduces the likelihood that he has QJ, and he never has a naked jack because he check raised the turn. The flush draws and straight draws bricked. In reality though, this was a terrible card if he went all in, though a good card if he checked. It is just exceptionally unlikely that a good player continues on a bluff there, as the jack is a terrible card to bluff. And no, this isn't one of those "but if its bad to bluff, and you will fold, doesn't that make it a good card to bluff!?" Sometimes cards are just bad to bluff at.

I called, and after talking to some friends about the hand, I got pretty depressed. It was a 2006 call for me. I have no excuses for it, it was just a colossal mistake. I go into every poker game expecting to play perfect, always figuring out the best play, in every situation. Making small mistakes is one thing, but making a clearly huge mistake just drove me insane. I am at the point in my no limit development, that the mistakes I can make should only be unavoidable ones, and they should not be in 25k tournaments. They should not be such clutch mistakes.

I had some friends over that night as a farewell of sorts, and they could tell I was pretty upset. I rarely let my "work" carry over to my life but that day was different. I couldn't stop thinking that I played poorly, I played my F game. One thing that consoled me though, was a video that they made me watch.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=45mMioJ5szc

It isn't about never failing, it is about cutting out the failures that are unnecessary. I will never tilt, I will never make a call out of frustration, I will never call because I feel like I am obligated to. Those are the only promises I can make myself.

Yesterday I played a short, but pretty monstrous session at 10/20, which made me feel a lot better. Today I woke up energized and pumped, and ready to tear Vegas apart. My flight leaves in 5 hours, and I can hardly wait. The $40k NL tournament is this week, and I am super excited for it. Long levels of deep stacked NL against some really tough, and some really soft players will be fun.

Wish me luck in a summer sure to be filled with some violent swings.